Mubarak didn’t have to go
“I tell you, you really had me scared there for a moment!”
(How it could have ended, if only…)
I just figured it out. Mubarak could have won over the masses if only he had had the good sense to open a Twitter account:
7:30 am
Just had breakfast. It was ok, but probably not as good as you get at home. Please don’t believe everything you hear. Everything I eat is brought to me, and you know that nobody fixes for other people with the same care as if they are cooking for themselves.
8:15 am
Just received a letter from Obama. It sounds almost like a threat. You people think you have it rough. Imagine being me.
8:45 am
I just received a call from Hillary Clinton. They ARE threatening me. At least that’s how I take it. NOW do you believe that I am the unlucky one?
10:30 am
Had a nap. Refreshed now. How are you all doing? How I wish I could be in the streets with you. I miss you all.
12 noon
Some of you have written me some nice messages. I appreciate that. You have been able to see my predicament. I never wanted to be a leader. I wanted to be a simple carpenter. I always liked working with tools.
1:00 pm
I can hardly believe my good fortune. Many many people are writing me kind messages and encouragements, and I realize now that opening a Twitter account is one of the best things I ever did.
2:30 pm
My military informs me that the crowds are beginning to disperse. People are starting to spread the word that I am not such a bad guy. I have tears in my eyes as I type this.
3:00 pm
My military tells me that the palace is easy and quiet now, and that I would probably be greeted with cheers if I ventured out. I want to believe them. I do know that you have all been very kind since I opened my Twitter account this morning.
4:30 pm
Back inside. I did it. I got up the courage to go out and meet you, my people. I didn’t expect to be hoisted upon shoulders with cheers of “We love you!”, but that is precisely what happened.
6:00 pm
CNN is now reporting that the Egyptian people now feel that this has all been a terrible misunderstanding. Things are changed, and everything is returning to normal. I guess that the internet does have a place after all. I promise to send out Tweets every day. I never knew that it would mean so much to you.
