A new survey definitively shows how Americans feel about what is almost certainly the most important issue facing the country: which candidate is better able to deal with an alien invasion?
The results of the survey…offer a decisve victory for President Obama in the extraterrestrial diplomacy arena, a portfolio he has no doubt watched closely during his administration. 65% of survey respondents believe Obama would handle an alien invasion better than Romney.
- 36% of Americans think UFOs exist; 11% believe they have personally seen one.
- If the traditional intergalactic diplomatic process ran amok, and superheroes somehow became real, 21% of respondents would request the Hulk’s assistance. 12% would flash the Bat Signal, while just 8% would trust Spiderman…
- A vast majority of the public – 79% – believe the U.S. government has kept information about UFOs secret.
While I intend to use all means available to stiffen the backbone of debate interlocutors sufficiently to get someone to ask both candidates for a “Yes” or “No” on whether they believe in evolution – I may have to settle for plans to combat alien invasion.