Billionaires Party(s) retain control of Congress

A new poll indicates that billionaires are likely to retain control of the United States government.

The poll, conducted by the University of Minnesota’s Opinion Research Institute, shows that the proxy candidates of billionaires are likely to win ninety-eight per cent of…Tuesday’s races, with the remaining two per cent leaning billionaire.

Although the poll indicates that some races are still “too close to call,” the fact that billionaires funded candidates on both sides puts the races safely in their column.

Davis Logsdon, who supervised the poll for the University of Minnesota, said that…Tuesday should be “a big night for oligarchs” and that both houses of Congress can be expected to grovel at the feet of their money-gushing paymasters for at least the next two years.

Calling the billionaires’ upcoming electoral romp “historic,” Logsdon said, “We have not seen the super-rich maintain such a vise-like grip on the government since the days immediately preceding the French Revolution.”

I think most folks who wander by this blog would be hard-pressed to consider this piece to be satire. I think it’s as accurate as anything available through the whole bloody election cycle.

Let’s save it for 2016.

4 thoughts on “Billionaires Party(s) retain control of Congress

  1. misterhoneyman says:

    Puleese Mr Eideard. Billionaires and millionaires of days gone past have always run the government.They are now just a little incy bit more comfy. Not ideal I’ll grant you but it changes little. The Whitehouse’s corporate sponsors will still get rich at the expense of the baby eaters or maybe the stars will align for a crack at Putins deck. Time to say that the super secret Behead-O-Tron 5000 has fallen into ISIS hands?

    The Whitehouse will continue to reduce liberty for ‘security’ despite the empty rhetoric of both parties. A terrified public will let them and will get neither. It has also happened here in Oz.

    Think happy thoughts! My new christian supervisor says so! Double plus good!

    • eideard says:

      At least you have the odd Green to vote for, an occasional spoiler. Enviros here haven’t the smarts to get past the Walt Disney theory of history – which says the right figurehead will lead us to the Jordan River.

      • misterhoneyman says:

        The Greens are a disappointing and predictable bunch, Very much middle class city dwellers with no real concept of country. Still they are more closely aligned to my own demented thoughts that the major parties.

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