New rules for UFO sightings start [of course] by calling them something else

The U.S. Navy is drafting new guidelines for pilots and other personnel to report encounters with “unidentified aircraft,” a significant new step in creating a formal process to collect and analyze the unexplained sightings — and destigmatize them.

The previously unreported move is in response to a series of sightings of unknown, highly advanced aircraft intruding on Navy strike groups and other sensitive military formations and facilities…

To be clear, the Navy isn’t endorsing the idea that its sailors have encountered alien spacecraft. But it is acknowledging there have been enough strange aerial sightings by credible and highly trained military personnel that they need to be recorded in the official record and studied — rather than dismissed as some kooky phenomena from the realm of science-fiction…

Luis Elizondo, the former Pentagon official who ran the so-called AATIP [Advanced Aerospace Threat Identification Program] office, complained after he retired from government service that the Pentagon’s approach to these unidentified aircraft has been far too blasé.

“If you are in a busy airport and see something you are supposed to say something,” Elizondo said. “With our own military members it is kind of the opposite: ‘If you do see something, don’t say something.'”

Tales of American Military bureaucracy still seem to echo the worst of history’s examples. You’d think that with a budget guaranteed larger than any other significant combination of nations a bit of confidence might temper the character of our own Colonel Blimps. Or Admiral Blimps.

Oklahoma coppers shoot robbery suspect – and 3 children

Three children were wounded in a police shooting Friday in Oklahoma when an officer fired at a man in a truck who was suspected of robbing a restaurant earlier in the month…

❝ The three injured children and a fourth child were all in the truck with William Devaughn Smith, Arbeitman said. The bureau initially said two children were shot but later learned a third child was also struck. Officials did not immediately release the names, ages or conditions of the children.

❝ Smith was treated and released at a hospital in Paris, Texas, about 30 miles south of Hugo…Paris Police Chief Bob Hundle said he did not know the details of what happened in Hugo but that his officers took Smith into custody so that he could be booked at the Lamar County, Texas, jail on a warrant for aggravated robbery.

None of the reporting [yet] says that Smith was armed. None of the reporting says anything about why the police considered him the suspect in the robbery. They still haven’t determined whether or not the robbery was committed by someone who actually used a weapon.

Scrotox! Huh, Wha?

❝ A few years ago, men would have never thought about getting Botox, fillers or cosmetic surgery because they thought they were just for women…

❝ While most of you will think the only place to get the injections would be your face, there’s plenty of other areas and one of those includes your testicles.

❝ Yep, arguably the most sensitive part of a guy’s body is being injected with Botox to make it look more appealing. Let’s be honest, it’s certainly not the prettiest part of a bloke’s body but it seems as though some want it looking better.

The procedure has been dubbed ‘Scrotox’, obviously amalgamating Botox and scrotum, and it costs up to $1,000.

Eeeugh!

Thanks, UrsaRodinia (I think…)

Climate change coming — corporate coppers are getting ready

❝ …Their statistical and tactical approaches (are) fundamentally connected. All businesses exposed themselves to risk, which had to be mitigated, insured or, more relevantly, defended against. Even if the Pinkertons couldn’t predict the specific risks of the future, they had a general sense of what it might look like — and what opportunities they might avail themselves of as it materialized.

According to the World Bank, by 2050 some 140 million people may be displaced by sea-level rise and extreme weather, driving escalations in crime, political unrest and resource conflict. Even if the most conservative predictions about our climate future prove overstated, a 1.5-degree Celsius rise in temperature during the next century will almost certainly provoke chaos, in what experts call climate change’s “threat multiplier”: Displacement begets desperation begets disorder. Reading these projections from the relative comforts of the C-suite, it wasn’t difficult to see why a company might consider enhancing its security protocols.

❝ For Pinkerton, the bet is twofold: first, that there’s no real material difference between climate change and any other conflict — as the world grows more predictably dangerous, tactical know-how will simply be more in demand than ever. And second, that by adding data analytics, Pinkerton stands to compete more directly with traditional consulting firms like Deloitte, which offer pre- and postdisaster services (supply-chain monitoring, damage documentation, etc.), but which cannot, say, dispatch a helicopter full of armed guards to Guatemala in an afternoon. In theory, Pinkerton can do both — a fully militarized managerial class at corporate disposal.

Better read this, folks! Our Fake President and the Republican Party of Pimps for corporate America have their side of this question already picked out. To them, mitigating the effects of climate change – much less reversal – aren’t especially critical to the class of profiteers who will own the cool breezes of mountaintop sanctuaries and any other calm, cool, company command posts (golf course included) they require. Folks who need jobs that pay well for ignoring who you kill and maim will not be in short supply.