Need a weapon for a holdup? There’s an app for that

New London — A man who police say attempted to rob the Northern Indian restaurant Wednesday on State Street had a change of heart when the cooks confronted him with kitchen knives.

Police said that at 4:25 p.m. they responded to the restaurant for a report of a suspicious person.

When officers arrived, they learned that a masked man, later identified as Jerome Taylor, had entered the establishment from the Green Street service entrance and demanded money from the cooks. The victims said the man displayed a small handgun.

Police said the cooks grabbed some kitchen knives and refused to comply with Taylor’s demands…

Taylor fled and was captured several hours later after he led police on a foot chase in the area of 297 Bank St. Police said Taylor confessed and claimed the handgun was a black iPhone.

Initially, the victims of the crime were reluctant to involve police because they felt sorry for Taylor in light of the holiday season…

Taylor, 20, of 76 Federal St., was charged with interfering with police, first-degree criminal attempt to commit first-degree robbery and criminal attempt to commit sixth-degree larceny.

Har! Nice try.

Phony lord and sex shop owner convicted of attempted bank theft

A self-styled lord and a Soho sex shop owner have been found guilty of helping to organise an attempt to hack into City bank accounts and steal £229m. “Lord” Hugh Rodley, 61, and David Nash, 47, were convicted at Snaresbrook crown court for their part in a sophisticated electronic fraud and money laundering operation.

The gang targeted the City offices of the Sumitomo Mitsui Banking Corporation. If successful, it would have been the largest bank raid ever carried out in the United Kingdom.

The gang were defeated, however, by relatively elementary errors in filling out electronic forms on the Swift international transfer payment system. They had acquired account details and matching passwords by installing key-logging software on the bank’s computers…

Both Rodley and Nash were remanded in custody. They will be sentenced tomorrow along with three other members of the gang who have already pleaded guilty: the bank insider and security supervisor Kevin O’Donoghue, 34, of Birmingham; a Belgian computer expert, Jan Van Osselaer, 32; and Van Osselaer’s recruiter, Gilles Poelvoorde, 35. All admitted conspiracy to steal.

This illustrates how even the least competent crooks can acquire over-the-counter technology for illicit purposes. What if one of them had been a half-decent script kiddie or gamer, eh?